($60 Value)
After old age, seeking a career in professional wrestling, and enduring the full force of Godzilla's breath, stress is the leading cause of bodily deterioration. Help bolster fading façades with today's Groupon: for $30, you get your choice of a one-hour therapeutic, deep-tissue, or Swedish massage at Vitality Massage Therapy (a $60 value) in the Fairwood Shopping Center.
Helmed by a nationally certified and highly trained tension eliminator, Vitality Massage Therapy soothes aches and pains while kneading stress into oblivion. Their friendly muscle magicians specialize in a variety of techniques for adapting each tenderization to specific needs. In the cozy confines of a private treatment room, skin suits can opt to receive a soothing Swedish massage of light to medium strokes that melt away the tension caused by your poltergeist's recent discovery of your fireworks collection. A deep-tissue massage targets subterranean muscle layers, digging stress out by its wily roots. Those looking to accelerate recovery from injuries sustained while jogging or speed reading can surrender muscles to the healing prowess of a therapeutic massage.
Although Vitality Massage Therapy offers a discount to new customers, this Groupon still represents the best deal available.
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